Song of Brave Sir Robin
Narrator: So, each of the Knights went their separate ways. Sir Robin rode north, through the dark forest of Ewing, accompanied by his favourite minstrels. Minstrel: Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot He was not afraid to die, oh, brave Sir Robin He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin He was not in the least bit scared to be smashed into a pulp Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin His head bashed in, and his heart cut out, And his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, And his nostrils raped, and his bottom burned off, And his penis split- Robin: That’s, er, that’s enough music for now lads. Looks like there’s dirty work afoot. Minstrel: Brave Sir Robin ran away. Robin: No! Minstrel: Bravely ran away away. Robin: I didn’t! Minstrel: When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled. Robin: No! Minstrel: Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about. Robin: I didn’t! Minstrel: And gallantly he chickened out. Robin: I never did! Minstrel: Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. Robin: All lies! Minstrel: Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin! Robin: I never!
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