My Bear Tibbers [League of Legends]

Surprisingly few people ever questioned the popularity of a show whose episodes lasted only a minute and a half before turning into a savage bloodbath. Frankly, it was refreshing for a program to just cut to the chase and give the public what they wanted: to see stupid people culled from the population. Sure, the actors lived in a constant state of terror. Certainly, the janitors tired of “Evisceration Wednesdays.“ And of course, people began to wonder why there were so many mysterious open cages set around the city’s alleyways, always freshly set each morning with tattered hats and tin cans wrapped in soiled newspapers to attract the homeless. But the profit margins on the missing person to Mystery Meat brand dog food ratios were *amazing.* Later seasons of the show would introduce many new characters, as most survived only a few minutes into their introductory scenes. Most prominent and often blamed for the series’ deterioration was Tibbers’ twenty-eighth wife, a vaguely hourglass-shap
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